Parents Q&A

Question:
I am the step-mom of two active boys. One who is 6 and one who is 9. After I moved in a year ago, their father and I have been using your positive approach to raising our kids. Some days we are good at it and some days we have to go back to the books. I have two questions. You are always talking about appropriate consequences. Can you give a novice some specific examples for what appropriate consequences are? What can you do when your 6 (then 5 year old ) Kindergartner, who was never in day care, won't speed up in the morning and is in danger of missing the bus?

Question:

My name is Vicky and I am a mother of an 11-year-old going on 12 son. This has been the most trying year I have had with him. He is rude when speaking to others, swears, defiant, disruptive, and argumentative, and lies. He has escalated this year to the point that last night he was kicked out of our Tae Kwon Do academy until he can rationalize his behaviours to our Master. I am in the midst of reading Positive Discipline and do believe that it works, at the same time I am struggling with thinking up consequences for these types of behaviour that are both kind and firm.

Question:

I just read your response to the lady regarding her partners five-year-old son. And, after reading the article by Mike Brock on Relational Parenting, his words confirmed for me what I have been feeling for a long time... we are not being good models of behavior with the constant, and sometimes intense, arguing.