Blog

Refuses to Cooperate

I have a son in the 1st Grade. When things don't go his way, he refuses to cooperate. He either becomes a "statue," a "limp rag doll," or becomes defiant in other ways. I have read your book "Positive Discipline" and my husband is in the middle of reading it. I have given him choices as you suggest, and he responds with "neither." Then I'm stumped.

Positive Effects of Class Meetings

I had one of those this-is-what-makes-it-all-worthwhile events this morning. Yesterday, I did one of my "classroom visits" (a.k.a., teacher observation) and during part of the class a student was invited to the overhead projector to demonstrate how to solve a problem to the rest of the class (third grade). But as he tried to explain how to do the problem, he got all confused and stuck and couldn't work his way through it.

LOOKING FOR SOLUTIONS IN THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE

I had a "Positive Discipline Moment" today. One of our eighth grade teachers came to me with a student problem. It seems that Jennifer, the student, brought some kind of technological wizardry into Spanish class, some kind of computerized note pad that also has the capability of altering TV channels and sound, like a remote control.

Planting Seeds of Change Through Positive Discipline

In our mobile society it is not uncommon for some families to relocate several times in a child's school career. This was true for Jimmy who moved to our school from a West Coast inner-city school.

Family Meetings

Dear Jane,

I have a question about family meetings. We have just started them at our home and already are pleased and having fun with the results. We have a family of four; my husband, myself and two daughters 7 and 5. My five year old has been reluctant to sit in the entire meeting unless we are talking about something that is important to her (getting a pet snake).

Child Runs and Explores While Shopping

Question:
I have just found your website and am going to go buy one of the positive discipline books tomorrow. My daughter is almost 17months old and is a very good little girl. Our challenge is when we are out and about, shopping or farmers market for example. She wants to run and explore (of course), she runs away and we end up having to chase her, even when we tell her no or stop. I know she is at an exploration stage but I don't know when to discipline versus letting her run around. I guess I just don't know when true discipline should be implemented?

Can Discipline Nurture Children?

QUESTION:

I run a support group for Day Care Providers in a small city in MA. Some of the members have a concern about the nurturing of one member in particular. She readily admits she spanks her own children (Bible backed) and says she does not hit the daycare children.

7-Year-Old and High Level of Frustration

Question:

Our seven year-old is very bright, social, and out going. She is very daring and often makes decisions that escalate into more than they started out being. For example, when she's doing something like talking back she doesn't know when to stop she become so over the top frustrated that then she starts getting defiant when she is told to go to her room etc...She has a you can't get me kinda attitude. I'm sure she is just pushing it off or hiding the hurt. How do we help her? I recognize that we all make bad decisions. I'd like to teach her how to recognize the bad decision and apologize etc before she makes it worse.

Question:

Any suggestions for weaning a toddler?

My first child is now 2 and 1/2. If I'm around (and I am for the most part) she breastfeeds to sleep, and wants to breastfeed during the day (which we've mostly stopped.) She can fall asleep on her own-as she does at "school" 2 days a week.

Hi, I know you have a few answers about this on your web site, but my problem is a little different. My son doesn't mind going to preschool, but after about half an hour he looks for his parents (usually my husband drops him off and we're both very careful to tell him when we leave and say "good-bye"). Then he starts to cry for about half an hour. Eventually he calms down, but about an hour later he starts to cry again. When we come to get him, he is ready to leave immediately (he's sitting there crying, with his backpack on). It's only been a few times, but I'm very worried.