Question:
Dr. Nelsen,
I have been trying the class meetings for about 15 weeks now. Some classes
have come along okay, but others still say that I need to take more control
of the classroom because they are still not convinced that the meetings are
working. How would I address this issue? I have already gone through all
of the building blocks.
Also, I teach middle school with four different classes. When dealing with
discipline, I like to be as consistent as possible with all of my classes.
How am I expected to be consistent with all of my classes when each might
come up with different consequences for a problem? I can't possibly have
four different policies and maintain consistency. The only way I can think
of is to present every problem to each class and vote on the solutions
brainstormed by all classes. What are your thoughts on this? Jeff
Answer:
Hi Jeff,
I'm wondering why others say you need to take more control of the classroom? Do you feel you have less control? Effective class meetings actually provide teachers with more control without acting controlling because the control is shared by everyone in the classroom. Actually, instead of the need for control, students learn self-discipline, responsibility, cooperation, and problem-solving skills.
Are other teachers in your school using class meetings as well? Is your staff using Teachers Helping Teachers Problem Solving Steps (in the Positive Discipline in the Classroom Manual)? It is not clear from your letter if you have taught yourself class meetings from the book or have taken the Positive Discipline in the Classroom 2 day workshop. If you have not taken the workshop you might find it helpful. Getting together with a group of teachers who are all working on class meetings and have different levels of experience can be very valuable and help you with some of the small things that can make facilitating the process of getting your class "into" class meetings much easier. If there is not a workshop scheduled in your area in the next year, we would be glad to create one if you can find 15-20 teachers who are interested. Our 2003 workshop schedule can be found on our website at www.positivediscipline.com. Click on "Workshops" and then on Positive Discipline in the Classroom.
Regarding your question about consequences, I'm wondering if you have the latest edition of "Positive Discipline in the Classroom" where we discuss, "No More Logical Consequences — At Least Hardly Ever.' You can also find an article with this title on our website. In a nutshell, I suggest eliminating consequences and focusing on solutions. Teach your students to brainstorm for solutions that are respectful, related, reasonable, and helpful to solve the problem. Then, do not call for a vote. Instead allow the students who have the problem to choose the solution that will be most helpful. When you do this, it doesn't matter if there are different solutions. That is so limiting. Imagine how creative students can be when you teach them to focus on solutions instead of blame and punishment. They can come up with hundreds of ideas about how to solve a problem respectfully.
I'm wondering what you mean by policies. It is contrary to the spirit of Positive Discipline Class Meetings to have "policies" for problems — other than a policy of mutual respect, and/or a policy of finding solutions that are related, respectful, reasonable, and helpful. You could also have a policy that "we have faith in our abilities to find respectful solutions to problems." I'm wondering if the kind of policies you refer to really mean a set of punishments for certain behaviors. (By the way, trying to disguise a punishment by calling it a consequence does not make it less of a punishment.) Punishments are designed to make students "pay" for their mistakes. Solutions are designed to help students learn from their mistakes.
When teaches want to have "control" over students, that is an invitation for rebellion, resentment, sneakiness. We suggest having faith in students to learn and practice the skills of mutual respect. I hope this helps. Respectfully, Jane Nelsen
Next Question:
Dr. Nelsen,
Thank you very much for your reply. I do have the latest edition of Positive Discipline as my reference and have been using it regularly with all of my classes. I agree with your philosophy of solutions versus punishment or consequences. I have been hitting on this pretty hard in my
class meetings. This leads me to my next question. What if students only come up with consequences or punishments during a class meeting? I have already tried to talk with them about solutions that help and not hurt, but they insist that punishment is the only way to stop the behavior.
Also, I have had to send students to the principal being so disruptive and it seemed to be the only way to deal with the situation due to safety issues and just to maintain order. Where is the line between trying to help one troubled individual and neglecting the majority of the class?
Thank you. Jeff
Answer:
Hi Jeff,
It is important to remember that learning the skills (the eight building blocks for effective class meetings) takes time, just as it takes time to learn Math, Science, English or any other academic subject. The Positive Discipline in the classroom book contains several activities that may need to be repeated to teach these skills. There are even more activities in the Positive Discipline in the Classroom manual.
A very simple activity is to write down every suggestion during the brainstorming time. Then, before asking the person who had the problem to choose a solution that will work, ask the students which ones should be eliminated because they are punitive, disrespectful, or impractical. Only solutions will be left — unless they haven't learned what solutions are?
Let them know that punishment is designed to make people "pay" for what they have done. Solutions are designed to help people find a solution that will help them avoid the mistake in the future — or to make amends for their mistake. Teach them that solutions are 1) related, 2) respectful), 3) reasonable, and 4) helpful. To give them practice brainstorming for solutions, you might present a hypothetical problem so personalities are not involved.
Regarding sending a student to the principal's office, I suggest talking with your students and letting them know that you have faith in them eventually to learn how to be respectful and how to treat each other respectfully. Meanwhile, until that occurs, it may be necessary to kindly and firmly request that a student leave the room if they are being disrespectful. You might add, "I look forward to having you back when you are ready to be respectful."
