Past Questions

Building Community Michael L. Brock
Winter 2002-2003



In my 1996 publication School-Smart Parenting: Raising Children for Success and Happiness in School, and again in 7 Strategies for Developing Capable Students, coauthored with Steve Glenn, I introduced the idea of a No-Rescue Contract that could be used in school settings to promote respect, responsibility, and closer parent/school relations. The contract has gone through several revisions since; here it is reproduced in its latest form, and I offer it with the recommendation that you consider using it, adapted as you see fit for your school.

Central Elementary School

No-Rescue Contract

Recognizing that our ultimate responsibility as parents is to provide our children with both roots and wings—roots so they will always know where home is, and wings so they will some day be able to make it on their own—and committed to raising our children as self-reliant young people who will grow to understand that their efforts do have consequences, we hereby pledge to try our best to support them in those efforts by:

• affirming them as capable young people who can dress themselves, do their own homework, pack their own bags, find their own way to their desks, and deal with forgotten homework, supplies, and lunches on their own;

• affirming them as significant young people who are true contributors in our family life, not just objects of our direction or recipients of our rescuing, and who can, with our patient assistance, come up with ideas on their own on how best to do their homework, how best to ensure that their clothes are ready in the morning, and how best to remember to bring all their supplies to school; and

• affirming them as young people of influence who can make decisions on their own, experience the consequences of those decisions, and work with us to grow in an understanding of why their particular efforts yielded the results that they experienced.

As parents, we realize that it is far more important that our children make mistakes from which they can learn than that we always look good. We pledge to work with them in both their successes and "near-successes" so that they can learn from them. We further pledge to support the efforts of the teachers to ensure effective discipline at the school and, in the event of a disciplinary concern, to dialogue with our children in ways that will help them gain a greater understanding of what happened, why it happened that way, and what they can do next time to ensure a better outcome.

As students, we pledge to do our very best at all times, to take responsibility for our behavior and our assignments, and to work cooperatively with our teachers and fellow students.

And together, we parents and students pledge to treat each other respectfully at all times, understanding that respect is not something that we need to earn but is, rather, owed to every man, woman, and child unconditionally.

Parent Signature(s) ______________________________________________________
Student Signature __________________________________ Date ________________


 

 

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